


harder than diamond

by wehdile



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Ableism, Gen, Implied Power Imbalance, Unrequited Crush
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-14
Updated: 2016-08-14
Packaged: 2018-08-07 06:30:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,085
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7704061
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wehdile/pseuds/wehdile
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There is something wrong with Lonsdaleite.</p>
            </blockquote>





	harder than diamond

There is something wrong with Lonsdaleite.

For a Pearl to even consider such a heretical thought would be enough reason to shatter her. Lonsdaleite would be well within Her right to do so for there is no doubt She is a Diamond. The silvery-white gem set between Her shoulder blades shows such rank, a perfect gem cut of 90° angles that catch the light beautifully on the occasions she, a lowly Pearl, is allowed to aid Her with polishing such a beautiful gemstone.

It is Lonsdaleite’s right to stand with the great White, Yellow, and Blue as equals. They are said to be the pinnacles of perfection, the infallible matriarchs who had and will led their Empire to flourish across star systems. Despite her turbulent (accidental) creation, Her position and brilliance has never been questioned even when She first emerged and shook the Empire to its core. Or so Pearl has garnered from old Holo broadcasts although she is not foolish enough to think that she could ever understand the complicated workings of a Kindergarten despite a burning curiosity to _know more_ which rages somewhere deep in her Gem.

Yet there is something wrong with Lonsdaleite.

It is not a physical deformity so far as Pearl can tell. Her Diamond is perfect, just as tall and imposing as her fellows if a bit stockier than either thanks to Her unique crystalline composition that is more reminiscent of a Graphite than a Diamond. This is not knowledge Pearl should possess and she never doubts her Diamond’s perfection for even a moment.

It is Lonsdaleite’s eyes that captivate Pearl the most. They are as perfect as the rest of Her and the one true sign that differentiates Diamonds from common Gems. Symmetrical diamond pupils that, when combined with the bright yellow irises surrounded by black sclera pierce right through her like a knife. It is an honor, she thinks, to be looked upon by such fierce, sharp eyes. They are the eyes of a leader, of a true Diamond born from the flames of a meteorite as it roared through a colony’s atmosphere to strike down a new Kindergarten. Truly She is beautiful in the manner She carries Her form, beautiful in the way Her hair falls to one side in thick, rich chestnut strands that Pearl aches to run her fingers through.

Yet there is something wrong with Lonsdaleite which Pearl cannot ignore.

It takes her a few cycles to realize it is a defect of the mind that Lonsdaleite suffers from, a sickness of the psyche that would be reason enough to shatter a lesser Gem. Her Diamond is clever though, and hides Her...unpredictability well in the company of fellow Diamonds. Only when they are alone does the facade of indifferent pride and confidence drop away to reveal a chaotic Gem whose mood is a pendulum which swings between frenzied mania and deep apathy. They follow an unseen cycle so Pearl memorizes the subtle cues in her Diamond’s body language that point towards an oncoming mood swing and prepares accordingly. It is a delicate science she realizes, and cannot help but take pride in her ability to adapt- especially when she is a defective, second hand Pearl not even made for her Diamond but nonetheless saved from being harvested by Her merciful hand. Other Gems may view their clashing color schemes- hues of brown that clashes with pastel shades of pink- and their differing gem placements- an oval pearl placed where an eye should be clashes with a diamond set between shoulder blades- as tacky or unappealing. Pearl does not mind the attention for she knows her Diamond is superior to all traitorous Gems who whispers behind Her back.

Pearl shares these observations her Other, the identical Pearl whom emerged from the same incubator as she, within their shared mental space- a perk of their unusual emergence.

Other scoffs at her interest in Lonsdaleite, emotions brought along with her words which are harsh and scolding. “Strong feelings for your proprietor, a Diamond of all Gems, will only lead to ruin. You’re losing sight of _our_ goals, all we’ve worked for.”

Pearl feels ashamed, irritated that Other would insult her and insinuate she has anything to do with ‘their’ plan in the same thought. “It is _your_ plan, not mine. I would never betray Homeworld or my Diamond.”

She feels a moment of hesitance from Other, the sensation of withholding a remark that threatens to spill forth at a moment's notice. That sensation passes and Other merely laughs a haughty melody. “If you say so. Do you have the information I requested?”

Other talks more like a Gem then she should, defying her role as a Pearl through word usage in a way that sits heavy upon her Gem. ”Only if you have what I asked for.” They have grown apart with time, initially identical in every way save for gem placement before something happened and Other spiralled away and embraced rebel ideologies.

It disgusts Pearl yet she trades information with Other all the same. She cannot turn against the nearest thing to herself no matter how much it revolts her to divulge information for such nefarious purposes. She bids goodbye to Other and pulls away, refocusing her attention to the present. In the massive chair that Pearl stands besides, Lonsdaleite reclines, swiping through screens with a bored expression on her face perhaps in search of some scrap of information. Or maybe she is merely bored, disinterested and by the looks of her Diamond’s fingers that drum rhythmically on the arm of the chair, itching to move.

“Pearl,” Lonsdaleite speaks and Pearl stands to attention.

“Yes, my Diamond?”

Lonsdaleite dismisses the screens and rises to throw Her cloak over Her broad shoulders, doing the clasp which secures it in place. “We’re going for a walk,” She explains and then bends down to pick Pearl up. Pearl does not tense, has learned not to tense, when her Diamond’s massive hand scoops her up and deposits her upon Her shoulder. Pearl steadies herself on the armor which protrudes from Lonsdaleite’s shoulder, excitement coursing through her so strongly that she feels like she might dissipate her form. She remains corporal and manages to quiet her emotions, settling neatly on her Diamond’s shoulder as She exits the control room. No matter how lovely the scenery is that they pass, Pearl has eyes only for Lonsdaleite.

Yes, there is something wrong with Lonsdaleite but Pearl cannot help but adore Her.


End file.
